Divorced. That’s what I will soon be.
I have been separated for more than two years now. I was willing to stay separated for as long as it took – until I either saw the true fruit of repentance and truly believed I could trust my husband again, or until I knew he was still cheating on me. Sadly, it turned out to be the latter.
I’m so thankful for the way God brought out the truth. It’s a story too long for this post, but God showed His faithfulness throughout the process, and He taught me so much. I am coming out of this mess stronger in my faith, and more confident in my ability to hear God.
God has never abandoned me. Though there was a time when it felt everything else in my world was falling apart, Jesus was always there. He has been walking with me step-by-step through it all.
This is not the ending I ever envisioned to my marriage. But the man I married has free will, and this is the outcome of his choices.
As I move forward with the divorce, I am beginning to taste a spiritual freedom. I have been yoked to someone who has not been following God, and who has been actively hurting me and deceiving me. As that yoke is being untied, a burden is being lifted from me.
With this burden being lifted, I feel a new freedom to write.
I want to use what I’ve been through to help others. I know that God has called me to write, and I want to be obedient to that.
Also, I’ve decided to write under a pen name.
This will give me freedom to share personal details of my story that I believe will be helpful to others, without bringing more hurt or embarrassment to my children.
It will also enable me to write about my missionary work, without endangering my ministry partners.
I’m not adopting a pen name to hide who I am, but to enable me to share more of who I am.
The name I’ve chosen is symbolic of this new stage in my life.
It is Rebecca Nazzer.
I wanted to choose a name that means “Married Woman.”
Why would someone who is getting divorced choose a name that means “Married Woman?”
Because, as my marriage has unravelled, Jesus has made the truth that He is my husband more real to me than ever before. This is more than a pretty allegory to me, it is my real life.
Rebecca means “Yoked Together.” It is the closest name I found to my desired meaning (that I liked). I am yoked to Jesus! He is my faithful husband!
Nazzer is a variation of a name that means “Nazarene” or “One from Nazareth.” It seems fitting that since Jesus is my husband, I should take His surname.
My new marital status is not “Divorced.”
It is “Married to Jesus.”
Is there an option on facebook for that? There should be!
Copyright 2019 Rebecca Nazzer. All Rights Reserved.